If I Say No

This morning after I took a shower, I was sitting in my bed with the towel still wrapped around me. He comes into my room carrying his laptop. He sits down on my bed next to me, and sets his laptop down. He then pulls out his private part and starts stroking it. 

I’m thinking, “is he really thinking I am going to have s** with him”? And “that really isn’t the way to get a girl turned on”. 

He is trying to have s** with me. I try again to explain to him why I don’t have s** with him. I’ve tried to explain it more times than I can count. I have no s** drive at all. And it is because of the way he treats me and the things he says to me. But he insists that is not the reason. He fully believes I don’t have s** with him because I am having s** with other men. I absolutely am not.

After I tell him, respectfully, that I do not want to have s**, he took it well. But that has happened quite a bit lately, and I am not fooled. At least he isn’t instantly going into a rage and calling me names and breaking my things anymore. 

After a couple of hours past, I hear him yelling in his room. He was yelling about how disgusting something is. So I asked him what happened. I shouldn’t have asked. He, of course, started accusing me of having s** with someone yesterday. 

So I ignore it and walk away. I really don’t know what to do when he starts accusing me anymore. I just want to hide in a closet or anywhere that he won’t find me because I know the name calling and the withholding the things I need is going to start and go on for hours. 

I needed to go to the store. He had a truck and a motorcycle. I don’t have a vehicle. He said I could ride on the back of his motorcycle to the store. He knows I was in a motorcycle accident when I was a child, riding on the back of a bike with my uncle. So I do not ride on them anymore. 

He told me I can walk because he isn’t letting me take HIS truck. He insists that when I took it to the laundromat yesterday, I had sex with someone in it. And then he asked me if I got paid by the man I had sex with yesterday!! WHAT???